WE PASSED!!!

all glory to God :D

I don't know how to feel after my exams.

it's a long and anxious wait for results. All glory be unto God if I pass.

"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness" - 2 Corinthians 12:9

last day of lecture

yesterday was the very last lecture in med school.

Somehow I felt very heavy-hearted. five years of med school is going to end in 2 weeks' time when finals are over. student life is going to end too! meaning to student discounts for me anymore lolz!

One chapter of life has closed and another is going to open soon.

Different place and different people.

gonna end with this Y U NO meme hahaha. i bet everyone must be super bored with it now.

end of placement!

last friday was my last day of placement as a med student! I cant believe time flew by so fast! Another 5 weeks and it will be our finals.

I was pretty worried that I would not pass my end of placement assessment because I felt that I gave a very bad impression to my consultant. On different occasions, I have given the wrong answer to the same question three times during which my consultant had an exasperated look on his face. But thank God that I passed my assessment and also for His divine intervention because on the day before my assessment, another consultant gave me some feedback for my presentation which was very helpful. There was nothing to worry after all lol...because God is in control! Thank you all also for your prayers!

it feels sad to leave harrogate after spending 8 weeks there. We were given a house (a house house lol) to live during our stay there and I was housemates with D and F who were two very friendly Brits. On the last night of our stay there, we played the last game of monopoly deal and we each won a round!

Gonna miss the time in the Harrogate house with these two English friends! Just now at home, Esther was saying that F said hi to her and it was the first time a British person did that to her after lecture.

I'm very thankful to God for blessing me with the people around me. They could have been much worse than that but God has given me more than what I expected.

A time for everything

i cant believe it's time for me to apply for my foundation year job! Time really flies. Last week my group taught the third years examination skills and looking at them really reminded me of how I was when I was in their position. I remember doing things and performing certain steps in the examination bit very slowly for fear of making a mistake. And that was what I saw in the third year student when she was checking the visual field of her group mate.

third year was mainly to get things signed off in our log book. once it's done, it's done. no more repeating

Fourth year was a turning point. A time when we blossomed and grow.

fifth year is when we want to get as much experience as we can and when doing something once isn't enough.

We are the most senior person in med school now. first year medics think we are gods. But when we enter the working world, we are the most junior ones.

can you imagine us becoming doctors??

My heart echo the words from Ecclesiastes ( i have to refer a few times to get the spelling right lolz) chapter 3 on a time for everything. This is also specially dedicated to a friend who is going through a very hard and depressing time right now. It hurts to see someone suffering in pain and yet being unable to do something. The only way out is death but parting can be difficult because you will miss him/her terribly when he/she leaves. so there you go my friend, may God continue to be with you and your family during this time.

A Time for Everything

¹ There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under heaven:

² a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,

³ a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,

⁴ a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,

⁵ a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,

⁶ a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,

⁷ a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,

⁸ a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.

my room

I have finally left my old house which I have inhabited for 4 years. The room i'm living now is slightly cheaper and smaller than the previous one but overall, I'm very pleased with my new room because,

1. it's less crowded (one person less), hence more space!

2. it gives a more homely feel

3. the cupboard and table the landlord provide us are huge!

the tables are now near the heater so it's less cold when studying! note the double glazed window!! hopefully winter will be more bearable this year. The bed sits just nicely at the corner

bigger floor space for Esther to hula hoop lolz and play board game/cards ad. There's even space for the guitar!! *gasp* hahaha. But note the small entrance into the space (in the picture on the right) which is limited by the edge of the bed and a shoe rack

My table!! as you probably might have forgotten how my table in my previous room look like, let me refresh your memory again:

the table with no place to put my laptop and books but i managed to get through 4 years of med school with it.

My new table:

I know Esther will be like yaya, you have told us so many times already :P but I'm super duper pleased & happyx1000 with my table! there's even enough space to put my bookchair, my books, my bears, my stationery, laptop and even write on the table without having to move anything away! :):):):):)

♥♥♥♥♥♥

it's my 5th yr in med school already

hello!

this blog is officially declared dead and am ready to sign a death and cremation form.

wa so super lame -.-"

Anyway, i have now started fifth year and have just started placements. It's interesting to see myself growing each year and being able to tackle things which I thought I would not be able to.

I remember i used to be so scared at taking blood pressure because I fear that by not being accurate it would cost someone's life. lolz. But now it's no more the blood pressure, thank goodness. But i guess it's more on being able to confidently say and elicit signs in patients.

Hopefully with more practice and exposure, I will be more confident.

I cant believe in 9 months time i would be graduating to be a doctor. Again, if all goes well :)

PS: I will be going off facebook for a while until further notice haha. I think I have been spending a lot of time on it until it affects my quality of life - not going out to enjoy the fresh air, always hiding in my room etc

Now I can introduce myself as a final year medical student ad because I PASSED!!!!!

will blog more about this when I hv time. Thanks for your prayers everyone!

the long hours of talking to myself and many months of practising for the OSCE still are not enough to prepare us for the real one.

:(

pray that things will be fine

2 down 2 more to go

my mental state examination (as of 15/6/10):

appearance:

young girl with greasy messy hair and smelly clothes which looked as if they have not been changed for a week. Posture was rigid and tense with restless legs.

behaviour:

appeared to be tired and restless. But was agitated when mentioned the word OSCE. eye contact was difficult to maintain as eyes were buried in piles of books and notes.

speech:

speech was spontaneous and coherent with appropriate responses however was slightly fast in rate, tone and volume.

mood:

subjectively she described her mood as "not too bad"

objectively her mood was euthymic.

thought content:

no evidence of obsessive thoughts, delusions or phobias.

however she expressed feelings of helplessness and anxieties in the upcoming OSCE in the next two days. no suicidal ideation was elicited.

thought form:

she complained of episodes in which her thoughts have been sucked out by a vacuum leaving her mind empty.

Perception:

she denied any visual, auditory or tactile hallucinations.

However, she was seen (a few episodes) to be talking loudly to an invisible person and seemed to be asking and answering questions of the invisible person. One example was she was seen talking about antidepressants treatment to an unseen person.

cognition:

she was orientated in time place and person. Good concentration and attention. Memory was intact.

insight:

She has poor insight. Did not think she was unwell and therefore unwilling to accept treatment.

********************

2 papers down another 2 more to go!!!

What is left is the OSCE. I'm starting to have palpitations and sweaty hands at the thought of the OSCE.

what if I get tongue-tied during exam? or what if I don't know how to answer the questions the patient ask? what if my mind goes blank during exam? I had an episode of how my mind can go blank during a practise osce last week and it was so scary. It's as if my thoughts were sucked out by a vacuum leaving my mind empty.

Please pray for calmness, peace and confidence for the OSCE. Also for clarity of mind and God's wisdom to ask the right questions and answer appropriately. thank you all who are praying for me!

freedom is near

daily requirements:

h20 - 30-40mmol/kg

Na - 1-2mmol/kg

K - 1 mmol/kg

Cl- - 1.5mmol/kg

phosphate - 0.2-0.5mmol/kg

0.9% saline contains 154mmol/L Na+, no K+, 154 mmol/L Cl-

5% dextrose does not contain Na, K, Cl

dexSaline - 30mmol/L Na+, 30mmol/L Cl-, no K+

chancroid - gram -ve bacteria Haemophilus decreyi

salphingoctomy - removal of ectopic but preserving tube

salphingEctomy - removal of ectopic AND tube

abdo circumference --> accurate predictor for IUGR

normal range:

Na: 135-145

K: 3.5-5

Cr 70-150umol/L

Ca2+ 2.12-2.65 mmol/L

PaCo2: 4.7-6

T4: 8-22pmol/L

TSH: 0.35-5.5mlU/L

MCV: 80-100fL

ask me these next week, I probably won't be able to answer half of these without referring because my exams will be OVERRRR!!!

Freedom is near. I can smell it.

funding

I received a total of £560 for my elective funding!!

Wasn't really happy about it at first because 1. it was not what I expected as according to the seniors, they have received much more than this (blame on the economy downturn) 2. my friend managed to receive one funding of £800 and another friend received £250 for just an elective report whereas I am doing a blardy elective project which involves interviewing mothers and writing my findings in the report which i foresee wouldn't be easy! grrr

In an attempt to console myself, £560 isn't that bad because it's a person's monthly salary back home. I should also be grateful of what I got and I shouldn't compare myself with others and no use whining or moaning about why I din apply to this and that when the deadline is over.

Although £560 only covers part of my airticket but it's still better than nothing! So thank God for that! :D

exams

my exam is from 14th to 18th June. Please keep me in your prayers!!!

a week in the delivery suite

I feel helpless when I see women in labour pain and not being able to do anything to ease their pain because it's something they have to go through.

I saw a forseps delivery and it was the scariest thing I ever saw lol. The obs doctor was literally pulling the baby head by force. And what I meant by literally is he got into the 'tug-of-war' stance and used all the strength that he has to pull the baby head out with the woman screaming her lungs out. it was so scarrrrryyyy.

But the minute the baby was born, all the screaming stopped and the mum is smiling again. weeing is gonna be painful for her for the next few days

our male counterparts are so lucky to not to go through childbirth pain. Like what one of the mums said to her husband, 'you will never understand how painful it is'.

not fair! :P

Back!

Hi guys!

I'm back from Vienna! I'm totallly knackered with a slight headache probably due to dehydration. But I hope with a good rest tonight, I will be able to resume to my revision. I was so worried that the volcanic ash would cause cancellations in flights but thank God nothing happened and we went and arrived back safely!

The presentation went quite well. One of tutors reminded us many times to introduce ourselves as medical students so that the expectations on us were not high. But still, we were still shot with questions and my groupmate tactfully answered them!

That's me with my groupmates, Adam and Candice . Steph is the one taking the pic. Look at our excited faces!! We have finally made it there

now with Steph

The posh hotel where the conference was held! We had to pay 70 euros just for one day

This year marks the 50th year that MH was first described in 1960 by a doc in Aussie.

We sat and listened to all the talks in the morning for our presentation at 4pm

One of our supervisor in Leeds for this presentation who is the chair of the afternoon session. Apparently he's one of the 'big cheese' as my groupmates call it which I think means he has control and power over the whole conference. Knowing that we were unable to handle the questions due to our inexperience, he quickly cut off everyone's questions by telling everyone that time was running out and the next group should present.

My SSC tutor! He was promoted to being a consultant a few months ago.

The whole group from Leeds.

At the end of the conference, many people came up to our group to congratulate us on our good work. My tutor told us that there haven't been any students coming to their annual conference for some time already.

I guess this would be the highlight of my academic years in leeds. God has indeed blessed me with so many opportunities which I never thought I could have. I'm sure when I graduate I would have a lot of opportunities to attend conferences overseas, but for a medical student to be given such chance is something I would never dream of.

PS: I received an email from the uni that they have approved my Student Conference Fund award of £100. It cannot cover my full cost but it's still something. Thank God for that too!

Vienna

As promised, I said I would update about this upcoming Vienna trip which is gonna happen in 2 weeks' from now.

I was fortunate to have been involved in an audit for my year-long SSC project which evaluated the use of drugs in MH (Malignant Hyperthermia)reaction in the past 2 decades. As the condition is very rare, there is only one unit in the whole of UK which is based in Leeds. My tutor told the group that he was pleased with our work and suggested that we should present our findings in the annual meeting in Vienna when all MH units from all around Europe come together to meet.

It is a good opportunity, but the downside is that all expenses have to be from our pocket :(

Exams are less than 5 weeks away and some time off abroad is not very good for my revision.

Finger-crossed + toe-crossed that i can catch up with revision.

Exams are coming.

Anyone wana scream with me?

ARRRRRRRGGHHHHHHH!!

Post SSC celebration

We came up with an impromptu plan to eat nasi lemak and Bette, one of our malay friends, agreed to cook for us provided we buy her the ingredients.

it was a day filled with good food, friends and weather!

phew *wipes sweat of brow*

i hv finally finished my reflection and essay.

it's now time to focus on studies

♥ Esther you asked me how did I insert the ♥♥ thingy in the blog?

Nahhhh...

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

Hahaha. I copied these little hearts from fb and pasted it on here :P

This week has been so busy and I foresee a busy weekend! my 7-day easter hols came and went really fast and I'm now left with 8 weeks to exams *clutches table* *hyperventilate*

白兔加油! 加油! self motivation lol. someone else motivate me lah! can anot? heheh :P