Saturday, April 18, 2009

last week of work


Pink roses given by June (not my good buddy June but another June with the same name) and a card given by the colleagues.

I am touched by the kindness and thoughtfulness of my colleagues. My 1 year 7 months stint in RM has come to an end. One rather cynical guy asked me whether I would cry or not. Then he said, 'well I think you wouldn't cry because you haven't really talked much to many people'

If it was said a few years ago I would agree with him and wallow in self pity. haha. But now those words don't affect me anymore. I'm indeed quiet in Royal Mail but I have made a few good friends in RM who have made work there so enjoyable and fun. These are the people who made me feel so reluctant to leave.

Today while working, I heard my name through the intercom followed by the statement saying that today would be my last day of work (actually not, Saturday is my last day) and something else which I couldn't really catch. My face became so red hot until my friend noticed and said, 'look! her face is turning red!'

Embarrassed, I hid under the table to avoid everyone's stares. I finally got up smiling sheepishly.

I thank God for blessing me with such great people. I will miss them all =(

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

change

change. change. change. change. change

April is the month of change.

It's when the postage price increase again. sigh.

you can view the last two years postage price here. Everything is getting more and more expensive.

It's the beginning of the new tax year so the assessable pay and the amount of the tax paid on our pay slip is back to zero.

It's also time to add another 3600pounds into the tax-free ISA account to earn more money on interest!

These are one of the few usual things which happen every year in April.

*****
There are changes for me as well.

First of all was my brother being diagnosed with CML. It took me a while to absorb the shock. I was still very worry-free in the first few days. Finally the truth hit me and oh my it definitely hit me real hard. I never cry in front of anyone about it as I tried to ignore the feeling but one day when I was chatting with Yee in front of the webcam and he told me something about Jon. Tears started to well up in my eyes and Yee asked, you crying? I found myself denying it but more tears started coming out until it became uncontrollable. All the emotions which have built up over the week exploded and the tears which I have restrained came pouring down like rain.



Celebrating TT's birthday through the webcam was very meaningful and touching at the same time. The family have not got together for a long time already ever since Steph left for UK in 2005 and to be able to see everyone through the webcam was indeed touching and memorable.

So what has changed? My perspective of not just a medical student but a family member of a patient. No one can exactly understand the family feelings unless they themselves experience it. I also find myself questioning God a lot of things about why things happened and then finally deciding that God has His plans for us even though it may not be what we want. Saying that is easy but to finally decide that it is indeed His plans is difficult.

****
on a lighter note, I have finally (after a very very veryyyy long delay) and successfully (din manage previously) handed in my resignation letter to RM.


When I asked my dad whether I should quit RM or not, he said, 'yes asap please.' My friend June was shocked when I told her this week would be my last week.

"What?! you are going to leave me alone?"

sigh. on one hand i feel as if a big burden has been lifted off my shoulder. No more rushing to and fro from hospital and work and no more feeling sad over missed social events. On the other hand, I will miss my colleagues and the good income. I will find it very weird to be at home every weekday evenings and when I start joining the cell group.

As I will not be working anymore I have to start cutting down on my expenses. I am now back to using a pay as you go sim card. argh. For the past 2.5 years I have unconsciously become so dependent on a contract phone that I could just pick up the phone and call/text people. But now I have to think twice before doing these.

instead of complaining i must embrace these changes. must.

Saturday, April 04, 2009

me family ^^

physically not together but thanks to technology we could be virtually together ^.^

Happy Birthday Timothy!!

[生命中最可怕的不是死亡,而是絕望。生命中最大的神蹟就是,從絕望中找到希望。]

- 生命因愛動聽



You are always in our prayers dear Jon. Have faith and be strong!

In just one week, everything changed. First there was that accident. We were relieved that he didn't sustain any injuries and I reassured him that there wasn't anything to be worried about other than his elevated WCC.

Then came the unexpected blood test results. And the bad news.

The whole family was paralysed with shock. Suddenly I realised how fragile human life is. How we must appreciate life and time together with loved ones before it's too late and how we have always taken things for granted. Everytime I think of him I try to fight back tears. I still hope that it was just a bad dream =(

I'm touched by the support, the concerns and the prayers people have given to my family. There are still many things we should be grateful and thankful of in this time of grief. like what my dad said, 'I believe that miracles had been happening all this while'. God has His plans.