Wednesday, April 15, 2009


change. change. change. change. change

April is the month of change.

It's when the postage price increase again. sigh.

you can view the last two years postage price here. Everything is getting more and more expensive.

It's the beginning of the new tax year so the assessable pay and the amount of the tax paid on our pay slip is back to zero.

It's also time to add another 3600pounds into the tax-free ISA account to earn more money on interest!

These are one of the few usual things which happen every year in April.

There are changes for me as well.

First of all was my brother being diagnosed with CML. It took me a while to absorb the shock. I was still very worry-free in the first few days. Finally the truth hit me and oh my it definitely hit me real hard. I never cry in front of anyone about it as I tried to ignore the feeling but one day when I was chatting with Yee in front of the webcam and he told me something about Jon. Tears started to well up in my eyes and Yee asked, you crying? I found myself denying it but more tears started coming out until it became uncontrollable. All the emotions which have built up over the week exploded and the tears which I have restrained came pouring down like rain.

Celebrating TT's birthday through the webcam was very meaningful and touching at the same time. The family have not got together for a long time already ever since Steph left for UK in 2005 and to be able to see everyone through the webcam was indeed touching and memorable.

So what has changed? My perspective of not just a medical student but a family member of a patient. No one can exactly understand the family feelings unless they themselves experience it. I also find myself questioning God a lot of things about why things happened and then finally deciding that God has His plans for us even though it may not be what we want. Saying that is easy but to finally decide that it is indeed His plans is difficult.

on a lighter note, I have finally (after a very very veryyyy long delay) and successfully (din manage previously) handed in my resignation letter to RM.

When I asked my dad whether I should quit RM or not, he said, 'yes asap please.' My friend June was shocked when I told her this week would be my last week.

"What?! you are going to leave me alone?"

sigh. on one hand i feel as if a big burden has been lifted off my shoulder. No more rushing to and fro from hospital and work and no more feeling sad over missed social events. On the other hand, I will miss my colleagues and the good income. I will find it very weird to be at home every weekday evenings and when I start joining the cell group.

As I will not be working anymore I have to start cutting down on my expenses. I am now back to using a pay as you go sim card. argh. For the past 2.5 years I have unconsciously become so dependent on a contract phone that I could just pick up the phone and call/text people. But now I have to think twice before doing these.

instead of complaining i must embrace these changes. must.

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